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Family pet foils school shooting

Pet dachshund

Plans for a public school mass shooting were thwarted by a plucky pooch in Palma Ceia! A young man whose name is being withheld by authorities due to him being a minor who never actually carried out a crime but is named Calvin Mooshtock was in the middle of broadcasting a threatening message about what…

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Now, VOTE FOR US!

BOTBTNF

Two months ago to the day, June 3, we politely, humbly and respectfully demanded that you nominate us for a 2022 Best of the Bay Awards, presented by Creative Loafing. And you did it! Great job! I don’t know what we expected but THANKS! As a result, we’re one of ten finalists in the category…

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Rick Scott makes attempt to express concern for military service members

Scott USO

US Senator from Florida and rejected Star Wars droid prototype Rick Scott spent Thursday making care packages with The United Service Organizations Inc., better known as the USO, a nonprofit-charitable corporation that provides live entertainment, such as comedians, actors and musicians, social facilities, and other programs to members of the United States Armed Forces and…

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Raccoon behind local Planned Parenthood starves to death

Planned Parenthood raccoon

Following Roe v. Wade‘s overturn, women all around the country “literally can’t even” get an abortion. Well this affects women everywhere and men who are allergic to latex, it seems to be affecting others as well.  “He seems so jovial, so full of life,” says Oldsmar Planned Parenthood director, Lisa Cummings. “We showed up today…

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Channel 10 meteorologist Autumn Robertson leaving Tampa Bay Area

Autumn Robertson

WTSP’s Autumn Robertson announced on her Facebook page today that she has accepted a position with a television station in Los Angeles. “Some big, personal news… ✨⁣⁣⁣I’ll be joining the fantastic team at Spectrum News 1 in beautiful Los Angeles, California as their new weekday morning meteorologist.”⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣ – Autumn Robertson, via Facebook Robertson is originally…

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Hitler’s mom would have aborted him if not for abortion laws

Aborted Hitler

In a new bombshell discovery regarding Hitler’s mother’s diaries, the deceased former leader of Germany’s mother was planning to terminate the pregnancy if it were not for strict Austrian abortion laws. “I just have a really bad feeling about this baby” read an entry from Adelaide Hitler, Adolph’s mother. “I feel it squirming around my…

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Manufacturer recalls faulty emergency call boxes

Call Box

Emergico Systems Inc., a Tampa-based company that manufactures emergency response equipment has announced that they are recalling their new line of TeleTek6000® emergency call boxes following a recent failed beta-testing trial of the units at a school in a small town somewhere in Texas. “The way they were supposed to work is, in the event…

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Girl Scout cookie turf war raging in downtown Tampa

Girl Scout Cookies

Tampa’s Rick Scudlen decided he would help his 8-year-old daughter Caitlyn boost her sales of Girl Scout cookies this year. “She’s a tough little competitor so she wants to sell the most cookies. She gets that from her old man,” chuckled Scudlen, a sale associate at Robust Paradigm Shifters Inc., a company occupying an office…

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Rick Scott comes dangerously close to endorsing CRT

Rick Scott statue

Earlier today, U.S. Senator Rick Scott of Florida stopped just short of a full endorsement of Critical Race Theory (CRT), the extremely controversial and dangerous academic concept that teaches the core idea that race is a social construct, and that racism is not merely the product of individual bias or prejudice and also that white…

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Tampa sugar daddy accidentally funds war crimes in Ukraine

Ukraine Sugar Daddy

A Tampa man who had been virtually paying a woman overseas for her company was linked to funding Russian war crimes in Ukraine after it was discovered he was being catfished. Kemp Hiller, an archaeologist in Pasco County had been sending a woman over the internet $400 per month for 2 years, when he recently…

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