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NASA introduces outer safe space

NASA Safe Space

The National Air and Space Association announced that it will be figuratively launching an “outer safe space” which combines the conceptual moral complex of “safe spaces” with the cold dark vacuum of outer space/interstellar travel.

“We’ve been getting a lot of emails about whether the N-word is said in space and it’s constricted by the social rules of earth, so we decided to create an ‘outer safe space’ where people can hypothetically go into a grounded version of outer space which contains technology to insure an airtight, cold, dark, void of light space where people can go say whatever they want and it will be safe to do so.” Said head of NASA youth programs, Eleanor Smith Spoony

“People are more entitled than ever to say and do whatever they want, and it’s causing earth to suffer great deals of pain, so we realized the only way we’re going to fix this is if we can bring outer space to earth and create safe spaces with it, so we paid scientists a tiny fraction of what our yearly military spending is, and they were able to solve all of life’s ailments, including what to do with these super annoying people.” Spoony explained.

The outer safe space will formally open at the end of the year and will be free for citizens to use. It will be located centrally in the United States, and will be open 24 hours per day. The only catch is that once you enter the outer safe space you are not allowed to leave.

John Jacobs

About John Jacobs

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