Tampa News Force
Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
Tampa News Force Sports Analysts Break Down Lightning’s Loss to Calgary on “Pride Night”
Who’s right? Who’s wrong? 🏒🥅🌈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Tampa to Replace Speed Limit Signs with Thumbs-Up Emoji
Slow down, speed up, whatever you want to do is fine!
Florida Prison Guard Unable to Afford Rent, Commits Crime to Sleep in Prison
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
During a press conference at his secret science facility in Downtown Tampa, Microsoft Founder and billionaire philanthropist Bill Gates, announced that he alone designed and released COVID-19 with the hopes that it will spread from China and infect every man, woman and child around the globe so that he could then cure everyone with his…
”I just want to apologize to China and to the Chinese people who have been unfairly and ruthlessly judged because we thought CODVID-19 originated from a Chinese citizen eating an infected bat. It turns out bats are completely safe to eat and we have just been being total dicks about it.” Dr. Wolfe said solemnly at a CDC press conference at Tampa General Hospital.
“Of course you guys can come over and look around,” he said. “You’re not only my favorite news organization in the whole world but the coolest guys I’ve met in Tampa and my new best friends!”
Hey, remember the Lawrence Welk television program? Wasn’t that just a wonderful television program?
Hell no I don’t remember that shit! I’m not that old!
Here’s your ding dang news.
The next installment in the ‘Despicable Me’ series was set to follow the lives of the adorable single-celled yellow organisms called Minions as they traversed the complex world of adulthood. The film was set to release in the Summer of 2020, but due to current situation with Coronavirus, ‘Adult Minions’ has been pushed back to…
The former restaurant/new hardware store offers a number of extremely expensive items, all of which come with complimentary menu selections.
“I know you’re not supposed to celebrate a death,” said Tampa resident Brenner Yuletide, “But I’ve got to say, I’m happy this mean SOB is dead!” Yuletide continued.
“It’s an asteroid, roughly the size of Africa”, he says. “The trajectory is still undetermined but it is an imminent threat to earth.”
“Just Kidding” Bernie said, running out of a metro bathroom trying to catch a train.
“What about me?” Said IG model SteffXOXO69<3