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Second Mysterious Monolith Discovered in Tampa Greyhound Track Parking Lot

Second Monolith discovered in Tampa




In what many are calling a sign of the upcoming apocalypse, Tampa Government officials announced that they have discovered a mysterious metal monolith in the parking lot of the Tampa Greyhound Track (TGT).

“We thought this place had been abandoned for decades,” said Dyerhea Juice, senior aerial survey crew member for the Tampa Government. “During our routine survey we noticed this shiny object and decided to check it out.”

After landing in the parking lot of the TGT, Juice and his team approached the mysterious monolith and began touching it.

“It felt warm, and after feeling up on it for a while I began to feel my soul astral projecting out into the ether,” said Juice.  “My eyes rolled to the back of my head and then I orgasmed on myself. I think everyone should come check this thing out.”

Juice and his team have announced that they are quitting their jobs and starting a church based on their experience with the monolith. Experts are saying that this monolith has no relation to the one that was recently discovered in the Utah desert.

TGT, which still operates a poker room after its greyhound track was banned from holding races, announced that they had no idea that thing was out there and that it’s probably just some junk they threw out in the parking lot.