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St. Pete Man Barely Survives Pride Weekend

Barry Shlivers of St. Petersburg considers himself lucky to have gotten through this past weekend’s annual Pride festivities alive. 

“It was terrible,” he said. “I kept showing up at these various events all over town that I didn’t have to attend and pleaded with people enjoying themselves and not hurting anyone over my bullhorn to stop shoving their gay agenda down my throat. But the more I pleaded, the more they kept shoving their gay agendas down my throat. Like they thought I wanted their gay agenda shoved down my throat, in spite of my protests. Over and over and over again. A gay agenda here, a gay agenda there. Every time finishing deep in the back of my throat. It was relentless. I’ve never seen so many gay agendas, let alone had so many shoved down my throat. I spent the whole weekend with one thick, throbbing, veiny, gay agenda after another being shoved down my throat. I’m exhausted.”

“It’s not funny. Why are you laughing at me?” he added. “What, do you want to shove your gay agenda down my throat too? All right, come over here but then that is it!”

Clark Brooks

About Clark Brooks

Senior Supreme Executive Premium Content Editor for Tampa News Force. Comedian, writer and ordained minister. Twitter: @ClarkBrooks | Instagram:@ClarkBrooks54


  1. Avatar Jean on June 26, 2024 at 7:11 am

    You really think it’s funny to dismiss the legitimate concerns of millions of people worried about these people influencing our children? That’s what these so called PRIDE events are. You should be ashamed of yourself.

    • TNF TNF on June 27, 2024 at 12:54 pm

      What we think is funny is the irony of homophobes always using the same, very specific euphemism to describe how they hate hearing about anything associated with the LGBTQ community.
      Nice gender-neutral name, by the way.

  2. Avatar Jean on June 27, 2024 at 1:08 pm

    JEAN is a woman’s name dumbass

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