Skip to content

DeSantis plans to travel back in time to prevent vaccinations


Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is in Tampa today to attempt going back in time to prevent the invention and implementation of vaccines for polio, measles, smallpox and other conditions that have been virtually eradicated. “I don’t know what it was like back then because obviously I don’t study or learn from history, recent or otherwise.…

Read More

DeSantis accepts support from Biden, becomes physically ill

Sick Ron

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis expressed appreciation to President Joe Biden for leading the federal response to the collapse of a condo building in the coastal suburb of Surfside last week. “You recognized the severity of this tragedy from day one, and you’ve been very supportive”, he said, wincing in obvious discomfort and addressing Biden as…

Read More

DeSantis bans all foreign journalists who come from countries that start with the letter K


In an effort to avoid potentially embarrassing situations like Rudy Giuliani’s appearance in the new Borat film, Florida governor Ron DeSantis is enacting an immediate emergency ban on all foreign journalists coming to the state of Florida from countries whose names begin with the letter K. “Foreign operatives interfering with our democratic process are a…

Read More

Governor Desantis declares Florida a State of Emergen-C®

Tampa Social Club – Hillsborough County – Sunday 2.24.2019 Speaking to a standing room crowd at Tampa’s most prestigious social club, Florida Governor Ron Desantis started by thanking the crowd and then coughed…for a while. One of his aides rushed to the stage and handed him a cup of water. He reached for the cup…

Read More