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Pirates angry over Gasparilla appropriation

Upset Pirate

A group of Gulf Coast pirates have officially filed a complaint with the state department over claims that Gasparilla is offensive to native pirate culture and the Tampa holiday is exploitative and appropriating their culture. “First of all, beads have nothing to do with Pirates,” said Long John Turquoise, a pirate attached to the class…

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You can turn in your Gasparilla beads for a free lap dance

Tampa Strip Club designated a National Landmark

A new promotion by Teasers Strip Club aims to get patrons to stop tossing Gasparilla beads in to the Hillsborough River by letting folks exchange them for a free lap dance. “We love the sea animals, especially the manatees,” said local stripper Nate Roscoe. “I’m the only person the promotion is good for, I’m a…

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Bootleg Gasparilla event names grand marshal

Bootleg Gasparilla Grand Marshall Get's Ready to Rock the Tampa Streets

Larry Kippers of Tampa Heights, known as “That guy that walks around picking up dog poop even though he doesn’t own a dog” will serve as the grand marshal for the 2020 Totally Not Affiliated With Gasparilla Boost Mobile Pirate Festival.  “Each year, Ye Mystic Krewe of the Sunoco Station at the corner of Nebraska…

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Man missing since Gasparilla found alive in Port-O-John

Gulfport Port-O-John Center – Pinellas County – Monday, 2.25.2019 Missing USF student and Gasparilla celebrant, Brandon Chisney, has been found safe and sound in a portable toilet at an arts festival in nearby Gulfport. “I had a tent at the festival, displaying my various pieces featuring stuffed sea birds nailed to driftwood”, says the man…

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Gasparilla Extended to Last Entire Month of February

Bayshore – Tampa – Friday, 1.25.2019 “Now we’ll see how much they really like pirates.” Says county commissioner Ben Gordon. “Citizens are constantly talking about Gasparilla and pirates and the Bucs, we figured, why not try an experiment here and give people what they want.” The Gasparilla pirate invasion will now last from Saturday, January…

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Publix and Nicki Minaj partner up for Gasparilla-themed Eat The Booty Like Groceries campaign

Publix Super Market – South Tampa – Tuesday, 1.22.2019 Tampa-area Publix Super Market stores are teaming up with Nicki Minaj, famous for her song “Chun-Li”, in an exciting Gasparilla-themed promotion called “Eat the Booty Like Groceries”. From now until the end of Gasparilla, Publix will be playing a special playlist of classic Nikki Minaj hits…

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