Posts Tagged ‘governor desantis’
Ron DeSantis sucks d**k to prove he’s not gay
Governor Ron Desantis has made headlines again after publicly giving a blow job to a man during his last press conference to, “prove once and for all, that I’m not gay.” After relentless cyber-bullying, accusing the Governor of being gay, DeSantis decided to take matters into his own hands by bringing a male sex-worker to…
Read MoreDeSantis places restrictions on Kate Bush music
Due to being featured prominently in the popular Netflix series Stranger Things, the Kate Bush Song “Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God),” originally released in 1985, is a chart-topping hit again. “Yeah, and I’m sick of it,” said Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. “Damn song is everywhere, all the time.” For that reason, among…
Read MoreTampa News Force acquires naming rights to former Outback Bowl
The annual New Year’s Day college bowl game played at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, formerly known as the Outback Bowl, has a new name: the Tampa News Force Gay Pride Logo College Football Bowl. Bowl officials announced the four-year agreement Thursday afternoon during a ceremony at the Sunoco Station at the corner of Nebraska…
Read MoreDeSantis unlocks another achievement on way to Tyrant Master Badge
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis took another huge step forward in his quest to earn the somewhat coveted Tyrant Master Badge by threatening the Special Olympics with $27 million in fines for 5,500 violations of state law for requiring proof of coronavirus vaccination for attendees or participants. The Special Olympics dropped the restriction and released a…
Read MoreGov. DeSantis seen returning Louis Vuitton glasses
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis was spotted at International Mall returning a pair of Louis Vuitton sunglasses to the Louis Vuitton store. “They made me wait in that line outside just to return these.” DeSantis shook his head addressing the gathering of press outside of the store. “They were just too expensive, I couldn’t do it.”…
Read MoreDeSantis criminalizes ‘freaky Asian chicks’
In sweeping new stateside legislation introduced and passed into law entirely by Governor Ron DeSantis himself, what are described as “freaky Asian chicks” are now illegal in the state of Florida. “Man, they’re weird”, said DeSantis. “I don’t know what they’re up to, with their backpacks and schoolgirl costumes and coy giggling, but it can’t…
Read MoreAs approval rating drops, DeSantis reluctant to call out faithful but flatulent supporters
As the drastic increase in COVID-19 cases surges throughout the state of Florida, polls indicate that the popularity of Governor Ron DeSantis is dropping across the board among registered voters of all political persuasions, with his net approval rating (the share of voters who approve of his job performance minus the share who disapprove) falling…
Read MoreGovernor DeSantis grants exclusive access to TNF for all future legislative signing stuff
Following yesterday morning’s signing of a new bill by Florida Governor Ron DeSantis that aims to restrict voting rights for millions of people that was covered exclusively by Fox News, DeSantis announced that from now on all such legislative events will be covered by Tampa News Force and no other media outlets. “Yesterday’s event went…
Read MoreRon DeSantis preemptively buys Rat Bastards.com domain name
The office of Governor Ron DeSantis has acquired numerous domain names to preemptively stop any trolling, including Rat Bastards.com, Mole Rat Governor.com, Sniveling Failure.com, and Worst Governor Ever.com, to name a few amongst the hundreds bought. “The Governor was worried people might use those platforms to gather and ridicule him in a public forum, and…
Read MoreGovernor DeSantis creates an OnlyFans
Governor Ron DeSantis recently announced that handling Florida’s COVID-19 crisis has left him lost and confused, and effective immediately he will be stepping down as governor to become a Social Media “baddie.” Governor DeSantis claimed that being the governor was extremely stressful and it wasn’t for him anymore. He has since created an OnlyFans account…
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