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I-4 officially reclassified as an obscenity


I-4, the heavily travelled interstate highway that spans just over 132 miles connecting Tampa, Orlando and Daytona Beach, has been declared by the State of Florida to be an obscenity, a class four expression of profanity. Recognizing that the highway, which has always been heavily congested in certain areas on certain days of the week,…

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World record for traveling to Tampa via I-4 set reluctantly

A man traveling from Daytona Beach to Tampa via the I-4 interstate has set the Guinness World Record for fastest time, in spite of not even wanting to go. “I just don’t like Tampa,” said Dr. Sven Lolowitz, originally from Chicago and NOT Tampa. “Sometimes I have to go there for business, though. It sucks.…

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Bars, good and terrible, prepare to re-open tomorrow

The Local

The state of Florida ban on bars opening ends Monday morning at 12:01AM, finally allowing local watering holes to resume operating and hopefully generate revenue and bring some service industry employees back to work. During the ban that was put in place back in March as a result of quarantine measures related to the COVID-19…

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Tampa dad ruins family’s summer

Mike Mulligan of Tampa has inadvertently ruined what has already been one of the worst summers in recorded history for his family. “I really thought I was doing something good”, he says. “I just don’t understand how it could have turned out so badly.” “I’ll tell you exactly how”, offers his wife Denise. “Mike doesn’t…

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