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Adam Johnson returns Lombardi trophy to NFL Hall of Fame

Trophy returned

Accused US Capitol insurrectionist Adam Johnson of Parrish has confiscated the Lombardi Trophy, won by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Super Bowl LV earlier this month, and has returned it to the Pro Football Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio. “I’ve recently learned the importance of handling property with care. especially if that property doesn’t…

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Tampa man misses Super Bowl by one week

Counterfeit Super Bowl ticket

Scott Nurkington of Tampa bought a ticket to attend Super Bowl LV, held in Tampa at Raymond James Stadium on February 7th, but missed the event because he didn’t show up until yesterday. “What the hell!”, he exclaimed. “It’s over? Are you kidding me?” “I’m not the biggest sports fan but this was a big…

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Bucs sign Brady’s celebration attendant to contract extension

The world champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers have signed Boof Noosler to a one-year contract extension, following today’s celebratory boat parade. Noosler, whose job consists entirely of making sure quarterback Tom Brady doesn’t fall down and hurt himself after drinking too much tequila, has been deemed “absolutely essential” by general manager Jason Licht. “if there’s one…

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TNF refutes accusations of Super Bowl streaker shenanigans

Super Bowl Streaker

Following an incident involving a man running on the field during the fourth quarter of Super Bowl LV at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa last night, beloved and totally legitimate local media outlet Tampa News Force (TNF) is facing scurrilous accusations of orchestrating the cheap stunt to generate publicity. “That’s outrageous and 100% untrue”, said…

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Bucs less than hospitable as Super Bowl LV hosts

Super Bowl Champs!

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers beat the Kansas City Chiefs 31-9 in Super Bowl LV at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa Sunday night to claim the title of World Champions on behalf of the Tampa Bay Area once again. In the first Super Bowl to see a team play in their home stadium, the Bucs were…

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Guy with no reason to even be there ruins Super Bowl party

Largo Sports Bar

Chad Didilitz of Clearwater wrecked a perfectly fine Big Game gathering at a sports bar in Largo Sunday evening. “It’s about an hour before kick-off and everybody is already bummed out because of that guy”, said Mandy Tannenbaum, a server at Guzzlenutz Drink & Sportsery, referring to Didilitz, wearing a Detroit Lions jersey, sulking by…

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Man expects Barrett to honor commitment to his Super Bowl party

Nick “Big Nick” Henderson, a neighbor of Shaquil Barrett in Northwest Douglas County in Colorado, said he fully expects the Buccaneers linebacker to honor a promise he made last year to attend his Super Bowl party this Sunday, in spite of the Bucs being scheduled to play the Kansas City Chiefs for the NFL championship…

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Tampa PD foils plot to sabotage Super Bowl

Marchand busted

Tampa police have thwarted a plan intended to ruin the Super Bowl for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, arresting a man visiting from Boston at Raymond James Stadium Friday morning. “We’ve been getting reports that some creepy, rat-faced guy was going around licking people”, said police chief Brian Dugan. “At first, we thought it was probably…

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