Posts Tagged ‘tampa coronavirus’
Gasparilla cancelled for first time not due to war or racism: pissed-off Tampa Bay citizens speak out
Ye Mystic Krewe of Gasparilla announced this morning that this year’s Gasparilla parades, that had previously been postponed until April, have been cancelled. “Only a handful of times did our daring pirate invaders decide to spare the city from invasion due to unprecedented world events. This year, our pirates are making a similar decision to…
Read MoreDeSantis declares Mons Venus essential business
“This changes nothing. I didn’t vote for that moron before he started wearing gloves incorrectly and I’m not going to vote for his dumb ass now.”
Read MoreCDC releases statement: Coronavirus actually has Tampa origin
”I just want to apologize to China and to the Chinese people who have been unfairly and ruthlessly judged because we thought CODVID-19 originated from a Chinese citizen eating an infected bat. It turns out bats are completely safe to eat and we have just been being total dicks about it.” Dr. Wolfe said solemnly at a CDC press conference at Tampa General Hospital.
Read MoreTampa Bay Area thugs launch Covid-19 awareness program
“… for a limited time while we all go through this global health crisis, not only do snitches NOT get stitches, but snitches will get ‘wiches.”
Read MoreSt. Patrick’s Day basically the same this year
“So what’s the worst that could happen? “
Read MoreTeens who caused toilet paper hoarding panic ‘really, really sorry’
“Yeah, we’re sorry”, says 16-year-old Chad Didswell. “Yeah, really, really sorry”, says his best friend, 15-year-old Kevin Qug, as they exchanged a quick, subtle high-five when they thought I wasn’t looking.
Read MoreTampa Area Strippers Concerned About Corona Virus
“We used to pick up singles with our butt cracks without a second thought. Now, we worry where it has been”
Read More5 signs you may have Coronavirus
If you are ticklish you must get tested now.
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