Ybor City Launches HOA With a Twist
Tampa’s Ybor City is launching a new homeowner’s association that will be different than others in one important area.
“Say hello to the Homeless Owners Association,” said Pontius Pilaf, owner and operator of one of Ybor’s fancier restaurants. “You know, as opposed to people who own homes. Get it?”
“Now that Ybor City has officially been recognized as one of the best places to live in America by Money Magazine, due in no small part to the presence of my restaurant and the nicely-dressed people who go there, it’s time we started acting responsibly,” he said.
The Homeless Owners Association will charge dues and enforce appearance standards among the unhoused in Ybor in order to make them more presentable, but Pilaf insists that maintaining the clients dignity will be of primary importance.
“Hey Bob, the cardboard box is looking good, my friend! No visible grease or urine stains. Nice! You’re setting an example,” Pilaf shouted to an unhoused person during a recent walk through the neighborhood. “Keep up the good work, Bob!”
“My name is Tom,” muttered the man he was yelling at.
