You can turn in your Gasparilla beads for a free lap dance

A new promotion by Teasers Strip Club aims to get patrons to stop tossing Gasparilla beads in to the Hillsborough River by letting folks exchange them for a free lap dance.

“We love the sea animals, especially the manatees,” said local stripper Nate Roscoe. “I’m the only person the promotion is good for, I’m a young man and the only male stripper in this establishment.”

The promotion is part of an experiment to test out whether people would enjoy a lap dance from a young man as much as they would from a woman.

“I’ll try anything at least once, especially if it’s free,” said local Teasers Strip club patron Jenor Yinch. “I stole some beads from a few drunk kids at the parade the other day and I wanted to take advantage of the promotion.”

Yinch and I went to the strip club together to see how the promotion works out.

“Hey fellas, looking for a lap dance?” Asked Roscoe as soon as we walked in.

After looking at him, Yinch and I decided it was a much better use of our time throwing the beads in the river and never going back there.

Patrons have from now until the end of Gasparilla to take advantage of the promotion.