Search results for: Gaetz
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Read MoreDetails Emerging from Unreleased Gaetz Report
Following the House Ethics Committee’s decision to not release its report on the conduct of former Florida congressman and former candidate for U.S. Attorney General Matt Gaetz, disturbing details are still coming to light about specific allegations. Among the claims being made by witnesses who testified to the committee is that Gaetz inquired in text…
Read MoreMinecraft cosplayer mistaken for Matt Gaetz
Jeff Coldblum of Bradenton was in Tampa to attend Tampa Bay Comic Con held at the Tampa Convention Center this past weekend where he was greeted with hostility due to people mistaking him for U.S. representative and probable human trafficker Matt Gaetz. “They were so mean,” said Coldblum. “All these people getting in my face…
Read MoreMatt Gaetz sets up kissing booth at summer camp
“It was a joke!” Gaetz said during his morning press conference. “I was just being funny, I made a sign that said ‘kissing booth’ because it’s funny, and yes, I sat near the girls dorm and I proceeded to kiss girls for a few hours, but it was a goof!” Gaetz huffed. “Seriously, I don’t…
Read MoreMatt Gaetz kicked out of Congressional Fight Club for violating first rule of Congressional Fight Club
As the scandal surrounding the federal sex trafficking investigation of Florida Republican Congressman Matt Gaetz continues to spiral, Gaetz is finding himself increasingly isolated politically. Yesterday, he was ousted from Congressional Fight Club, a non-government sanctioned social organization consisting of male members of the House of Representatives gathering once a month in a sub-basement of…
Read MoreNew evidence of Matt Gaetz involvement with human trafficking comes to light
Following news that broke last night that Representative Matt Gaetz, (R) of Florida was the subject of a Justice Department investigation examining whether he violated federal sex trafficking laws, Gaetz made an appearance on Tucker Carlson’s television show to refute the accusations, during which new evidence was revealed that would seem to damage his claims…
Read MoreCreepy youth pastor lurking around Ybor confused with Matt Gaetz
A pastor for a new youth ministry cult east of Tampa has been spotted walking around Ybor City, and many people have mistakenly assumed he is Matt Gaetz, the U.S. representative for Florida’s 1st congressional district. “Matt Gaetz? Ha ha, no that’s not me. I’m Pastor Keith and I just want to hip the kids…
Read MoreMatt Gaetz Pelted with Water Balloons Full of Semen
Pensacola Town Hall – Escambia County – Tuesday, 5.4.2019 While leaving a town hall today, Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz was pelted by supporters with water ballons full of human and pig semen. “Any regular person who receives this kind of treatment would be outraged,” said Gaetz while licking some of the semen off his face, “But…
Read MoreShockingly Qualified Chronister Nominated to Head DEA
This frees up the position of Hillsborough County Sheriff, which would be an ideal fit for Dave Bautista.
Read MoreNew Perspective Brings Appreciation for Former Education Secretary
Ah, the good ol’ days
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