8 Local Celebrities Who Should Be Considered, But Not Necessarily Included in Ownership of the Lightning
“Tampa Bay Lightning Chairman & Governor Jeff Vinik and Vinik Sports Group today announced the sale of a portion of the Tampa Bay Lightning and Vinik Sports Group to a group of investors led by Doug Ostrover and Marc Lipschultz. The transaction, which will take effect immediately, was approved by the NHL’s Board of Governors on October 1, 2024.” – Tampa Bay Lightning press release from 10/24/24
You’ve never heard of Doug Ostrover or Marc Lipschultz because as hard as it might be to believe, all wealthy people don’t feel it’s necessary to constantly draw attention to themselves by saying idiotic things and behaving like assholes in public.
Are they local? Do they have sports experience? Maybe. Nobody knows and that’s okay. But it wouldn’t hurt if there were some high profile, at least somewhat sports-adjacent big names involved to add a little glam, a little glitz, a little zhuzh (did I spell that correctly?) and there are certainly local residents qualified to provide that…
Hulk Hogan, Clearwater – Former WWE wrestler and the go-to local celebrity everybody always thinks of first. Not John Travolta. Not Tom Cruise. Because they’re “weird”. Hulk Hogan. Yeah, okay.
Dave Bautista, South Tampa – Also a wrestler who is now a successful actor. He loves animals, which single-handedly makes the argument that everybody in South Tampa is NOT a douche.
John Cena, Wesley Chapel – Another wrestler because lots of them live around here. On second thought, this could be a bad idea because these three guys might not even like each other. I don’t know. I don’t follow wrestling.
NOT Titus O’Neil, all over the place -He’s a wrestler. He’s a philanthropist. He’s definitely local. So why not? Because I assume he’s either already part of it or is too busy actually helping people to get involved in something as relatively silly as sports ownership.
Mike Calta, Wesley Chapel – Maybe not a global celeb but hosts Tampa Bay’s number one radio show, is already a fan who goes to games all the time and knows A LOT of influential people. Plus, his involvement would absolutely infuriate Bubba the Love Sponge, who still exists for some unknown reason.
Monica Seles, Bradenton – Former tennis champion. It’s okay that she lives south of St. Pete; like Wesley Chapel, Bradenton and Sarasota are part of the Tampa Bay region when it’s convenient for us to include them. I’ve met Monica Seles a few times and can confirm that she is a very nice person.
Rob Gronkowski, somewhere else – A former world champion Tampa Bay Buccaneer. He doesn’t live here; he’s just around a lot, enough to be considered a local.
Joseph Malinowski aka “Lieutenant Dan”, ? – He’s a sailor, which is kind of athletic, I guess. Definitely famous though, at least for now. Apparently this guy doesn’t own anything besides an extensive criminal history. Let him own part of our hockey team. What’s the worst that could happen, he starts living at Amalie Arena?
You’re right, that’s probably not ideal.
