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Mass shooting interrupted by mass shooting

Shooters

A mass shooting that took place at Wet Willy’s Waterpark on Flankton Avenue in East Tampa was temporarily interrupted, when a second mass shooter, not connected to the first mass shooter, showed up to commit a mass shooting. Arnold Jeffries, who entered at the south entrance and began opening fire towards the lazy river noticed…

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Woke liberal falls asleep at the wheel, kills 400

Monster Truck

A self-proclaimed “ultra-woke liberal” man fell asleep while driving his monster truck during a monster truck show and accidentally drove into the stands, running over thousands of people, killing 400. Known as “The Woke Bloke,” the British-born monster truck driver, moved to the States as a child and become a bleeding-liberal, constantly championing whatever the…

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6 Ways white people can get away with saying the N-word

Speak

Play a character Leonardo Dicaprio, Edward Norton, Daniel Radcliffe, and many more of our most beloved white actors have gotten away with saying the N-word by doing it in character. When white people are playing racist characters in movies it’s ok for them to say the N-word.  Write it in a book That book Tom…

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Black Herstory Month and Black Themstory Month declared to be celebrated

Flags

Following Black History Month, 2 more months celebrating black excellence, “Black Herstory Month” and “Back Themstory Month” have been declared to recognize the achievements of black women and black trans people. “There’s only so much time in February to talk of all of black people’s accomplishments, it’s necessary we have more time to celebrate the…

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Baby’s first word is N word, protective services called

Baby N Word

Steve and Dan Dewey, a young married homosexual couple who are both pastors at a progressive church they co-own are being questioned after their adopted child said its first word, which was the N word, in a public park. The couple was playing bocce ball in Julian B. Lane park when the baby uttered the…

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Rick Scott shares New Years kiss with fleshlight

Former disgraced Florida Governor, and current Florida Senator, Rick Scott, was caught sharing a New Years kiss with a fleshlight, during a party a the Senators mansion. “Yea he just walked out during the countdown with this dripping sex toy, then gave it a big tongue kiss when the clock hit zero. It was pretty…

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10 things I wish were told to me as a child

Younger

Everyone is full of shit Everyone, including yourself, is a hypocritical, compulsive liar. Sometimes because you want to make people happy, sometimes for personal gain. Politicians, parents, teachers (as George Carlin said) all full of shit. People want things at all times. Very few people on earth are rarely at rest or are fully satisfied…

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Andrew Tate sparring session turns into all male orgy

Tate

A sparring session between world-famous social-media star Andrew Tate and some random guy, turned into a 50-person, all-male orgy. “We sucked we f*cked, the whole shebang.” Said Tate. I’m sorry I can’t even write this, it was over before it even started. The headline is the only funny part, there’s no reason to expand, the…

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