Man Warns Families to Keep Out of Tampa Denny’s

Dennis Flanagan, single again as usual on Christmas, was spotted outside the Denny’s at 2004 N. Dale Mabry earlier today, turning away potential customers.

“Nope. Turn around and get in your car. This place isn’t for you,” he was heard saying to one family of four, while taking a defensive physical stance and making vaguely threatening hand gestures.

“Look at you; happily married with two beautiful, healthy children,” he said as they started to leave. “Wearing your pajamas like you just rolled out of one big cozy bed and came here because you thought it would be a jolly romp. People like you make me sick. What are you even doing here?”

When it was suggested that they might have been hungry and available dining locations are limited on Christmas Day, he replied, “Fuck that. They should be somewhere eating roasted chestnuts and telling each other how much they love one another. Denny’s is for the lonely and sad every day of the year. I come here six days and nights a week. This is our place. We don’t need tourists on Christmas.”

As that family backed out of their parking space to leave, he yelled, “And I better not see you at Waffle House either!”