Skip to content






New Store Customers Confused But Not Disappointed





Some customers visiting the new Greenlane restaurant on Dale Mabry in Tampa were surprised by the nature of the business when they arrived.

“I thought for sure this was a weed dispensary when I drove by,” said local vegan Lisa Hurtzog. “That’s fine, though. I could go for some mashed chickpeas, tofu and alfalfa sprouts.”

“I knew it was a restaurant,” said marijuana enthusiast Reggie Witlop. “But I came in to see if I could buy some weed anyway. You never know.”

Further confusing them was the presence of former Tampa Bay Buccaneer Super Bowl Champion Rob Gronkowski, who has a stake in the venture and was on hand to help promote the grand opening on Friday.

“Wait… is that a cop? Why is there a cop here??” questioned Hurtzog. “Oh, it’s a football guy. Okay. Wait; that makes even less sense.”

“What is even going on here right now?” she added.

”I don’t know that he works here works here but there’s a guy named Ryan or Brian out back who hooked me up with some dank kush and some mashed chickpeas,” said Willow. “I think this is my new favorite restaurant.”

Clark Brooks

About Clark Brooks

Senior Supreme Executive Premium Content Editor for Tampa News Force. Comedian, writer and ordained minister. ClarkBrooks.com. Twitter: @ClarkBrooks | Instagram:@ClarkBrooks54

Leave a Comment