Per Usual, Local Idiots Unscathed by Tropical Storm

As is always the case when a significant tropical storm has any sort of impact whatsoever on the Tampa Bay Area, a certain segment of dummies went outside and played along Bayshore Blvd. in Tampa yesterday as Hurricane Helene battered the region with storm surge, gusts of high wind, heavy rain and tornadoes. 

And as is always the case, none of them suffered any injuries or other repercussions for their ill-advised actions. 

“We go outside for a perfectly good reason when the weather is like this,” said Chad Ditvoid, a moron from Tampa defensively as he took off his t-shirt and wrapped it around his head. “And that reason is WOOOO!!”

“Hey look, don’t label us as irresponsible; we have a plan in case something ever goes wrong,” said his equally stupid and selfish friend Gary Nurtz, who was wading in storm runoff, an excellent means of being exposed to a variety of parasites. “If one of us gets hurt, we will call 9-1-1 and some government emergency workers will have to do their jobs and come help us.”

“Also, WOOOO,” he added for no reason. 

Meanwhile, somebody in another part of the area who charged their communication devices, bought a reasonable amount of necessary supplies, secured the loose items on their property and sheltered safely within their home lost power for several hours and eventually emerged to find a large branch had fallen and totaled their car. Probably.