Physicians Re-brand Medical Condition

Physicians around the world, led by doctors at Tampa General Hospital (TGH) right here in Tampa have decided on a new and less hurtful description of a serious medical condition that afflicts millions.

“Medicine is evolving all the time and so is language,” said TGH’s Dr. Herschel Shertsqirtz. “Heck, I remember when nurses wore uniforms, doctors wore suits and you could call a gay man a faggot.”

“But similar to how we no longer use the term ‘retardation’ to refer to those who suffer from intellectual disabilities, we will now refer to people who are dealing with dementia as ‘having the sillies’.”

“For instance, I will tell a patient’s loved ones that the person they’ve known all their lives who doesn’t recognize them anymore has a Case of The Sillies,” he said. “If it’s a particularly severe diagnoses, I might say The Silly-Willies.”

“If your grandmother is disoriented, sad and frightened because she doesn’t remember where she is or what is happening, it’s far more kind and compassionate to say, ‘oh grandma, you’re so silly’ than it is to say, ‘oh grandma, you’re demented’,” he added kindly and compassionately.