If you’re a Tampa Bay Buccaneers fan and you’re feeling a little uneasy about tomorrow nights Wildcard Playoff game against the Philadelphia Eagles at Raymond James Stadium, it’s understandable. The team has been streaky and unpredictable, and has looked less than dominant even in victory.
But here are five completely true, non-satirical, indisputable, objective FACTS you can use to feel better about your beloved Bucs and as argument ammo if you get into an uncomfortable confrontation with Eagles fans.
THREEPEAT IN THE SOUTH
The Bucs streak of three straight years as division champs is currently the longest of any division champions in the NFC, as is their streak of four straight years going to the postseason either as division champs or as a wildcard.
HEAD COACH TODD BOWLES HAS NEVER FAILED TO MAKE THE PLAYOFFS
See above. He’s been the head coach for the last two seasons.
THEY’RE GETTING DEMONSTRABLY BETTER
They were 8-9 last year and they’re 9-8 this year. At this rate, they’ll be 10-7 next year and 11-6 the year after that. You see where this is going.
THE BUCS HAVE WON MORE NFC SOUTH DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIPS THAN ANY TEAM IN NFL HISTORY
I’m pretty sure that’s correct but I didn’t look it up. It just seems like we win it a lot. It’s probably accurate, considering the division has only been around since 2002.
Actually, this one might not be true. Don’t lead off with it.
THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS PHILADELPHIA NEWS FORCE
Philadelphia has a long tradition of being the worst human beings alive when it comes to being sports fans. They know that’s their reputation and they’re proud of it because they worked hard to earn it. Ask them, they’ll gladly tell you. Which is kind of weird, but it’s fine. Kudos to them for owning it.
But does Philadelphia have a comedy collective that exists to make fun of themselves and their outlandish goonery and buffoonish antics like we have here in Tampa Bay? No. No, they do not. It’s one thing to be proud of being a sociopath, it’s another not to have a sense of humor about it.