Ybor Statue Disappointed that Hot Girls Didn’t Pose for Selfies

The Centro Ybor statue of Roland M. Manteiga, a memorial to the publisher, and owner of La Gaceta, the only trilingual newspaper in the United States, was recently snubbed by two attractive women passing by.

“What the hell,” queried the statue, not the actual man who passed away in 1998. “I have tourists and club kids and stragglers of all kinds stop and take photos with me all the time. You’re too good to snuggle up to me and snap a couple selfies?”

”I mean, I don’t mind; it’s kind of my job to stand here all day and all night to be available for photo ops and I don’t really care,” it continued. “But for every half dozen fat couples from Wisconsin or handful of Molly-addled trend chasers, is it too much to ask to mix in a couple of hard-body thots? I don’t think that’s unreasonable.”

”You know, not for my sake; to bring attention to the newspaper.”

”We didn’t even see a statue. But what’s a newspaper?” LOL’ed the women as they walked away, oblivious.