Skip to content






Garrison Channel fish is sad that Lightning won’t three-peat





A fish that lives in Garrison Channel behind Amalie Arena is very disappointed to learn that the Tampa Bay Lightning lost 2-1 to the Colorado Avalanche in Game 6 of the 2022 Stanley Cup Final Sunday night, ending their championship winning streak at two.

“No b-b-b-b-b-b-b-boat parade?”, it asked in bubble language. “Golly. That’s sad.”

Yeah, it is sad, you dumb fish. There’s a lot more to it than boat parades. A lot more.

“I love the b-b-b-b-b-b-b-boat parades because people spill all kinds of b-b-b-b-b-b-b-booze and b-b-b-b-b-b-b-beer and stuff in the water where I live, and if you know anything about the Garrison Channel and the Hillsb-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-orough River that feeds into the channel, then you know that’s the healthiest the water ever gets,” added the stupid fish who is riddled with tumors due to the poor quality of the water it lives in and should never be eaten.

Clark Brooks

About Clark Brooks

Senior Supreme Executive Premium Content Editor for Tampa News Force. Comedian, writer and ordained minister. ClarkBrooks.com. Twitter: @ClarkBrooks | Instagram:@ClarkBrooks54