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Proof the government actually cares about you





Sike! There is no proof! You thought the government cared about you? How stupid can you be?

“But what about welfare? And public services? That’s for us!”

No it’s not!

Welfare is to keep people alive who don’t want to be alive because their existence has become so terrible it would make more sense for them to just leave this plane of reality, but they are being kept alive to keep doing jobs that robots haven’t completely mastered yet.

And public services? Like what, roads, and police, and parks? None of that is for you. Nothing is for you. You just need to do what you’re supposed to do and if you don’t, then “things” could happen to you.

Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a great system! 

The government is no different than humanity.

Selfish and self-serving with the projected image of humanity and generosity so it can get away with more immoral things.

This could sound cynical, but it’s not! I love all of it! The corporate greed, lobbying for laws to be changed so more water can be polluted and fractions of profits can increase for few people who benefit.

There’s other planets out there! Why are we so attached to this world? We constantly talk about this infinite universe, why are we so obsessed with this 1 planet?

“Because it’s mine!” Exactly, what a selfish thought.

You only love earth because you live on it.

Get over it.

There’s other planets out there that the richest people will be able to move to and then you just cross your fingers and pray that you come back as one of their children!

It’s really that easy guys, I don’t see what all the stress is about.

If your life sucks now, don’t worry! It’s just your current life! 

Matter cannot be destroyed it just dissipates and goes somewhere else. 

Your spirit will end up somewhere better! And if it doesn’t, just keep trying! You can’t be porn into a poor persons child forever! Eventually you will hit the universal lottery and come back as one of Nick Cannon’s children or one of the many other wealthy people providing enjoyable lives for their children.

Get over yourself.

If you think you’re so great or so important, then trust that your spirit will not just go away forever. Have some faith in the cosmos to push your energy in the right direction. If you have a bad attitude, you will stay in bad situations.

Just be positive and believe that despite external forces, including crooked global governments trying to hinder your every enjoyment, that eventually you will end up on top.

That’s nature right! Bad can’t stay bad forever. Unless you stay bad forever. Start being good and living good no matter what! Remember, nobody can make you do anything. Don’t want to go to work? Don’t! Become homeless! Get good at begging. If you don’t get good at it, die then go somewhere else! Again, why are you so attached to this life? If your life sucks, why do you want to keep living it this badly?

Now I’m not saying you should end your life at all, no. I’m just saying if your life sucks so badly, why aren’t you changing it? Change it! Fix it!

“It’s not that easy.”

Ok, nobody said it was easy. But do it anyway.

Hard stuff is worth it.

It’ll feel that much better when you do it.

Look at me? I’m sitting at the top floor of TNF headquarters, I went upstairs and cut my bosses head off and sewed his skin into a costume which I wear on a daily basis and trick the rest of the office into believing I’m the new boss! What happened to the reporter who worked on the 3rd floor, many stories below? He just “wrote a note claiming he quit and never came back.”

See how simple all of this is?

Again, I’m not telling anybody to cut their bosses head off and wear their skin, that’s just what happened to work for me. Every road has a different path and every person has a different journey to get to what they want.

Don’t hurt people (unless it’s fictional bosses, in which case you’re allowed to cut their heads off), don’t hurt yourself, don’t hurt nature, just go out and try to shine on the rest of the world and play to your strengths.

Figure out what you do better than the people around you and lean into that. Even if you don’t really like it. You’ve been given an ability others don’t have and you need to figure out what it is and maximize it’s potential. 

That’s the secret! Now it’s not a secret anymore! You have all the knowledge and ability to do whatever it is you want to do. Even by reading this right now you just accomplished something. Reading usually sucks for the most part! But it’s over now. You did reading for a little bit. Now you can go do something else like eat ice cream or jerk off. But don’t jerk off too much or eat ice cream too much. Just a little bit. That’s another secret. Those are really the only 2 secrets. I  forgot the first secret I told you because a siren went off out the window but I’m sure whatever it was, was valuable! Hopefully this article doesn’t prompt another call from my family asking “if I’m ok.”

I’m fine. That should be obvious.

I just like writing abstract stuff.

I forget what I write 10 seconds after I write it.

These are just the normal, innocent, unthreatening, safe thoughts that flow through my noggin at all times.

See it’s already gone.

What was I talking about?

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The comment sections on these articles are like abandoned Wild West saloons with doors slowly creaking off the hinges.

John Jacobs

About John Jacobs

MTV Reality TV Star and Award-Winning Tampa News Force Correspondent. Subscribe to YouTube Channel, Follow on Twitter: @MaybachDiamonds Instagram: @MaybachDiamonds