Ron DeSantis pledges to only appear in black and white from now on

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis declared at a press conference late yesterday afternoon that he will no longer appear in color in public appearances, opting to only be depicted in black and white.

“I’d prefer you not use that phrase; it makes me uncomfortable,” he said, noticeably squirming. “I call it ‘old-timey TV’.”

He went on to explain his reasoning for the sudden policy change.

“These new-fangled televisions are representative of ‘woke’ culture, with their insistent inclusion of a full spectrum of colors,” he said, referring to something that became a mainstream part of American culture in the mid 1960s. “Exactly. Things in this country have been going downhill ever since.”

“It needs to stop and it’s going to start stopping here with me,” he added. “You know the old saying: ‘Don’t be the change you don’t want to see in the world’ and that’s how we’re moving forward in Florida.”