Tampa News Force official 2021 holiday gift guide

It’s holiday season once again, when you disappoint your loved ones with the things you buy for them instead of your actions and life choices, like the rest of the time.

In an ultimately futile effort to minimize the damage you’re going to incur/cause, we proudly present the 2021 edition of the Tampa News Force Official Holiday Gift Guide! If it seems like there are fewer items listed this year, there are and there are two good explanations for that:

1. Supply chain issues. Something to do with ships not able to get to docks because of COVID or something. Probably Biden’s fault or Trump’s fault. Typical, right?
2. Apparently most of Tampa Bay’s comedians are doing so well on their own that they can’t be bothered to take advantage of an offer to advertise their merch for free. Hey, good for them! Or maybe they don’t have any merch to sell. Hey, sucks for them.

Anyway. here we go…

• Darcy Greco is a local author, comedian and frequent contributor to Tampa News Force. Her novel “One More Iris” is available everywhere, including WalMart!
  
• Speaking of books, Tampa News Force’s Senior Supreme Executive Content Editor and contributing writer Clark Brooks has two books now, and you can get both of them at Amazon.
  
• Speaking of Tampa News Force staff members, TNF co-founder John Jacobs‘ album “Still The One” is available as a FREE download right here at TampaNewsForce.com.
  
• Of course, the shop here at TampaNewsForce.com has an incredible selection of terrific essential lifestyle items, including:
  • The Official TNF Crime Finder Mesh Back Snapback Cap – One of the first things that established the credibility of Tampa News Force as a major local media outlet and crime finders was tireless coverage of the Seminole Heights Serial Killer story. This is the hat they would have worn during that pursuit if the hats had existed at that time.
    
  • A fun way to stay in touch with faraway friends is to send them postcards, like this one that features Florida Senator Rick Scott eating out a used Fleshlight. (NOTE: It’s entirely possible that the US Postal Service will refuse to deliver this item, because we don’t know if anybody has ever tried to send one in the mail. Let us know. We’re curious.)
    
  • TNF Leggings. Buy these for your mom; her ass will look even more phenomenal than it does now!
    
  • The “What Would Rick Scott Look Like With Hair” postcard. Yep, it’s another postcard but this one answers the question, “Would the ghoulish perpetrator of Medicare fraud look less like a hideous mutant earthworm if he had a glorious flowing mane?” (SPOILER ALERT: Kinda)
    
    

That’s it for this year. Happy Holidays!