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Ybor Bar to Host Straight Pride Night

Southern Nights, a festive LGBT nightclub in Ybor City featuring drag queens, DJs, go-go-dancers & cocktail specials, will be hosting a Straight Pride themed night next Tuesday. 

“I was reading some of the comments from people on the Tampa Bay Lightning’s Instagram page about their Pride Night event last week,” said Ethan Mossfeather, an event promoter not directly employed by the club. “It was the same things certain people post any time a sports team makes an effort to showcase inclusivity; ‘Why are you celebrating sex preferences? What about straight people? Where’s our celebration? Blah blah blah.’ And I thought, maybe they have a point. Probably not, but maybe! And maybe we should send the message that gay bars are for everyone!”

Asked if there’s any concern that this event might alienate any of the club’s regular customers, he said, “Maybe a little, but that seems more to be something you see from certain insecure, mouthy, uptight hypocrites. You know, bigots.”

“They do have an ugly-ass flag though. Nobody’s thrilled about that being on display. Good thing it’s only one night,” he added.

He said the next week will be spent preparing the establishment and its staff for the big night.

“When we first pitched the idea, the thought was to remove everything that makes it a gay bar in order to make straight people more comfortable but that idea was nixed because there’s no point in opening an Abblebee’s in Ybor,” he said. “Instead we are going to welcome them by making certain activities and practices available to experience in order to express appreciation and promote understanding.”

“Well it’s about goddamn time,” said Gavin DeOuche, an unabashed straight white man and one of the commenters on the Lightning’s Instagram, who can’t wait to try his alleged first gloryhole.

Clark Brooks

About Clark Brooks

Senior Supreme Executive Premium Content Editor for Tampa News Force. Comedian, writer and ordained minister. Twitter: @ClarkBrooks | Instagram:@ClarkBrooks54