5 things you shouldn’t eat after a workout

Getting the right nutrition after a work out is very important to muscle health and body growth. This list tells you what you should avoid eating after working out

Ass

When you perform analingus you ingest biomes and genomes that are a net negative on your gut health, especially after an ab workout. Your body has just produced a lot of lactic acid in the stomach area, so the nutrition your absorbing from eating ass will be counter productive to the chemical reaction currently taking place. Do not eat someone’s ass after a workout.

Candy canes

I heard one time something about candy canes, like the stripes were made of like mildew or something. I don’t know, I may have just made that up. You know when you make stuff up to try and impress people or just sound knowledgable and contribute to conversations? That might be what I’m doing right now but I’m earnestly not sure.

Coins

The iron and nickel in nickels and dimes are particularly bad for you after you’ve done physical activity. Your body will be craving proteins and carbs after athletic activities. And coins are dirty and border-line poisonous for you. They are very detrimental to you, and if you must eat coins, you should do it when there is nothing else going on in your body. Maybe before you’re about to sleep for 20+ hours it would be a good time for you to eat coins. But not after going to the gym

Snake skulls

Snakes have a priokenesis membrane within it’s medulla. When that membrane is pierced, alkaline-ketamine biotics flow from the cylindrical cranial cavity to the endeocreneesis chamber. If you eat that after working out you will die, almost instantly. Do not, whatever you do, eat the skull of a snake, after you have been doing cardio activities or even power lifting, despite what your friends might have told you about snake skulls. They are not good for you.

Lumber

The #1 thing you shouldn’t eat after working out is lumber. The wood chips and splinters will be very bad for every part of your physical and mental health. It will be terrible pain, and youre recently contracting muscles will want to reject the lumber immediately. It’s really, really, bad for you to eat lumber after hitting the weights, so please, for the sake of those around you, don’t do it. Sickness is quite literally guaranteed.