AI Unaware of Local Comedian
Norm Humpstool, an open mic comic from Brandon, was devastated to learn that he’s not nearly as successful as he thought and has been telling people, as confirmed by Meta’s Artificial Intelligence (AI) platform.
“I don’t understand. This is impossible,” he wailed pathetically upon seeing the result from searching for ‘Norm Humpstool Comedy’ on Facebook. “With the exception of how many fingers are supposed to be on a human hand, AI knows everything!”
Humpstool was searching for proof that he’s an established professional stand-up comedian with a sizable following in response to a gay audience member threatening to beat him up after his host set at a comedy club in which he used slurs disparaging homosexuals and the mentally challenged.
“I’m not somebody you can just come at like that; I’m kind of a big deal”, he muttered to himself after escaping the club and hiding in his bedroom at his mom’s house and typing “Norm Humpstool” into his computer’s search window, only to see this reply emerge immediately:
“I’m not familiar with a specific individual named Norm Humpstool. It’s possible that this person is a private individual or a public figure who doesn’t have a significant online presence. If you could provide more context or details about who Norm Humpstool is or what he is known for, I may be able to help you better.”
– Meta AI with Llama 3
“‘No significant online presence’?!? That doesn’t make sense. I was recently interviewed for one of those fake internet ‘magazines’ where you interview yourself which is huge because not everybody can do that. Almost anybody, sure, but not everybody. Also, my family and friends who’ve seen my TikTok videos say they’re fire and I know for a fact that the jokes I tell are good because the comics that actually write and perform them first get big laughs when they do them,” he mewled plaintively, as sobering self-realization began to set in for the first time in his life. “Is it possible that my videos… aren’t fire?”
Rallying quickly, he shrugged and said, “Oh well, at least AI knows I’m a male. That’s a start.”
