Inexplicably, the moon caught on fire today. Nobody understands why, and keeps pointing out that it should be impossible because there’s no air in space, so there shouldn’t be a way for a flame to exist.
The public is upset.
“I hate this.” Said Venessa Yukyuk.
“I don’t like when the moon is on fire, I just like looking at my phone.” Yukyuk then walked into traffic and was nearly hit by a speeding car.
“Fire moon is cool!” Said Kal Ripken.
“I like, when the moon is fire! It’s like, all fiery!” Smiled Ripken.
Churches are having emergency masses telling people that this is God, coming to smite them for something-or-other.
“I’m just happy aren’t complaining about my son’s drug use!” Said President Joe Biden.
“People won’t shut up about the fact that my kid smokes crack every now and then, so this is a great distraction to keep people away from me for a bit. I know they’ll come back soon, but until then, I will enjoy this fire moon.” Biden said, crossing his arms behind his head, and leaning back to relax with a fresh pair of aviator sunglasses on.
The moon has been on fire now for 18 hours, and nobody knows what will- wait, it just went out.
Aw, I was starting to like the fire moon.
No more fire moon, it’s over, it’s back to being that light-gray/bluish rock color. Boring. Bring back fire moon!