Sex acts to help your Hollywood career: Ranked
Trading sexual favors for career opportunities in Hollywood has been well documented over the last generation to the point where it’s common knowledge amongst almost all people in the world.
The scale of what sexual actions will get you has not been detailed, until now.
I will go through what you can expect to get from each sexual favor.
Hand job
If you’re willing to jerk someone off, (or finger them, in the rare cases where a female executive is exploiting you for sex) you can most likely land a role in a commercial. Most likely a speaking role, and depending on how hard they come, you might even get the lead.
Blow job
If you perform oral sex on someone in power in Hollywood, you can land a role in a sitcom. Probably not a leading role, but at the least a bit part, which will most likely be reoccurring, but depending on how you work it out, you may need to perform oral sex for every appearance you want on the television show. The more evidence you have of performing the act on the person in power, the more leverage you have to get back on. They may just place a hit on you if you get too annoying though, so don’t push your luck if you don’t feel safe and confident in your situation.
Sex
If you let someone penetrate you, you can expect to get a well-paying role in a movie or TV show. The bigger sexual act, the bigger screen you will appear on. You can become a household name based on who you’re willing to have sex with in Hollywood.
Sodomy
This is the biggest one. Your ass is basically the Oscar hole, and the more people you let f**k you in the ass, the closer you will get to becoming an A-list actor. What do you think the A stands for? Ass. It’s risky, because you raise your chances of dying from colon cancer, but if you want to be one of the greatest of all time, you will definitely need to be “open” (pardon my pun) to the experience of getting sodomized. Some of your favorite artists have been sodomized on a regular basis by very old people who have been passed down generational power. So get out there, and start pleasing some gatekeepers! Good luck! May the odds ever be in your favor.
