Rich Glombcroft of St. Petersburg is relieved that most people take a dim view of grooming now days.
“I’ve been telling people for years that brushing your teeth, clipping your toenails and washing your hair as well as your whole body is not only a waste of time but a crime against nature,” said Glombcroft who is not a homeless person but actually a very successful personal injury attorney. “God didn’t intend us to spray foreign chemicals all over ourselves. That’s a falsely manufactured construct of society designed to manipulate us into conformity.”
“I’ll have you know that I have boogers in my nose that have been up there since 1988,” he said. “You’d call that disgusting but I call it commitment.”
When informed that the kind of grooming that people had a problem with is preparing or training someone for a particular purpose or activity, specifically children for sexual activity and not practicing good hygiene for personal health and beauty, Glombcroft said, “Ok, yeah, that makes sense. Kids should definitely wash their neatly trimmed hair and wear clean clothes.”
“Everybody likes hot-ass kids,” he added. “What? Did I say something wrong?”