Tampa Bay’s newly christened team in the re-launched XFL, the Vipers, is preparing for the launch of their inaugural season in February of 2020 by making a playlist of songs commonly played at sporting events.
“Let’s be honest; the biggest challenge we face is establishing ourselves as a viable, legitimate professional sports franchise that the public takes seriously,” says Marc Trestman, the team’s general manager and head coach. “Especially when you take into account the not-so-glorious history of previous teams that have come and gone, including the original incarnation of the XFL. Hoo boy. That was a real stinker.”
A man calling himself DJ Snake-Eyes, who says he’s the team’s entertainment director says fans can count on hearing all their favorite classic sports anthems. “I’ve been on Apple Music for three straight days, looking for music to play at our games at Raymond James Stadium. For sure we’ll have ‘Bad to the Bone’, ‘Hip Hop Hooray’, ‘YMCA’, ‘Apache’, ‘Welcome to the Jungle’, ‘We Will Rock You’, ‘Celebration’ and many, many more! We’re gonna Pump Up the Volume and the Jam!”
Dr. Snake-Eyes (he told me he earned his advanced degree in Getting This Party Started… Right? while minoring in Getting This Party Started… Quickly from USF) says the organization is committed to providing fans with the best in-game entertainment experience possible.
“We had a staff meeting recently where I mentioned that I wanted to include, ‘Who Let The Dogs Out’ and Mr. Coach Trestman threw a coffee cup at my head and knocked me unconscious. When I woke up, I deleted that and replaced it with ‘Old Town Road’. We’re not messin’ around over here in Viperville! Get it? Viperville! I came up with that. Let me know if it catches on. Don’t tell Mr. Coach Trestman if it doesn’t.” Dr. Snake-Eyes then blew up a long green balloon, didn’t do anything to it, handed it to me and said, “It’s a viper. A Tampa Bay Viper! You’re welcome!” as he ushered me out of his temporary office, which is an abandoned food truck parked behind the Boost Mobile store.