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Can you afford Tampa?

Tampa housing

If you live in Tampa or are planning to move to the Tampa Bay area, you should ask yourself if you can afford Tampa. Here are some things to consider:

Do you have enough money to buy a Cuban sandwich twice a week?

How often do you frequent strip clubs and how much money do you spend per trip?

How many nights a week do you do recreational drugs?

How many times per day do you use prescription drugs?

Do you have an OnlyFans account?

Do you have multiple sworn mortal enemies?

Do you have enough space in your home for guns?

Can you afford to bribe a prostitute?

Do you like fake jewelry?

How often can you afford to spend money impressing a woman you want to sleep with?

Do you have to send money to your baby mother for a jet ski rental?

Did you remember to turn the thermostat down before you went to sleep, and can you afford the light bill?

Why are the tops of your feet so sunburnt?

Can you handle inhaling cigar smoke for upwards of 3+ hours at a time?

Does the sight of big breasts make you nauseous?

If you can answer all of these questions with clear and concise answers, then you should be able to afford the Tampa lifestyle.

John Jacobs

About John Jacobs

MTV Reality TV Star and Award-Winning Tampa News Force Correspondent. Subscribe to YouTube Channel, Follow on Twitter: @MaybachDiamonds Instagram: @MaybachDiamonds