Everything you need to know about Tampa

In this write up you will learn everything you need to know about the city of Tampa, with this one-stop guide.

Best Burger

Catacombs Burgers on 55th street

Catacombs Burgers located on west 55th street, in the north west part of the BoHo region. It’s a delight-and-a-half. Lots to enjoy, plenty for fairly priced good food. Everything you could want and more. Say hi to Regina behind the bar, she’s an amazing hostess and brew master.

Best Drinks

Chilly Diego’s Rum Shack on York Beach

For the perfect cocktail, or mocktail, come out to Chilly Diego’s Rum Shack snuggly located in the East corridor of York Beach at Upup County. They have tons of seasonal specialty drinks which are a joy no matter time of year it is, and the service is impeccable. Regina also happens to serve drinks there as well, however that is not the reason the location was featured. She’s great, I just want to make it clear it’s a coincidence this woman works at both, I’m just stating that.

Best Club

Astro’s on 6th

When it comes to dancing the night away, no location is better than Astro’s on north 6th street in West Harbor. I will get this out of the way up front, no Regina does not tend bar at this location. However, her sister Carolina works here, and we have started dating, even though Regina and I have a previous relationship so yes, it is messy, but none of this was my idea, it’s not my fault. Astro’s is a great place to dance and everything else is a matter of unfortunate coincidence. I swear.

Best Beach

South

The best beach in Tampa is definitely South Beach. My dad owns a large amount of the land in South Beach and he has his hands in the small shops and kiosks business as well, so when South Beach does well, my family does well. I am not going to hide that and I’m not ashamed to admit it. It’s the best beach. South Beach in the lower part of the Kanteen District in WeLa, parallel to Harbor Coast, is the most enjoyable beach in Tampa.

Best Place to Live

Regina’s Address (Needs Citation)

Regina has mentioned that her new place is the best place to live, but she hasn’t told me where that is, so if anyone knows where Regina lives, we’d love to add that location to the top of this category, because it sounds great. Carolina does not know either, or at least that’s what she’s telling me.

Best Local Eatery

Mancino Fall’s Resort Hotel Bar

I’ve been living at the Mancino Fall’s Resort Hotel in Sugar Pine County for 7 months now. It’s not what I prefer, but it’s all I know these days. The best place to eat here is the hotel bar because there aren’t any restaurants within 40 miles of the area. It was the only place I could afford to live on a $60 per month budget. Especially when you take in to account the cat food I buy for the alley cats. Carolina says she’s going to leave me if I don’t start at least making 3 figures per week. I try to tell her though, “It’s hard baby, please, it’s hard. I can’t make more than $60 per week no matter how hard I try, I just keep losing cock fights. I spend my money on illegal cock fights that happen in River Rock City after 9pm. I spend all day driving from Sugar Pines to Cantor County for the illegal cock fights and I lose a lot. I keep losing and it’s rough on me and Carolina, but this is all I know. I haven’t tried to learn much else, just raising fighting chickens and participating in the illegal act of gambling on their lives. Macabre to say the least. But Covid has been tough on us. Mentally it rotted my brain from the inside-out and now I don’t know how to fulfill my journalistic duties. I’m a failure and I can’t fix it no matter what I do.