Seminole Hard Rock casino changes name to Las Fake-ass

West Tampa – Hillsborough County – Thursday 4.11.2019

As expansion continues on Tampa’s Seminole Hard Rock Casino, owners have decided to rebrand and change the name.

“We have everything Vegas has except legal prostitution, but it’s not illegal if you don’t get caught,” chuckled one employee as he put a cigarette out on a cocktail waitress. “We’ve got table games, a poker room, over priced stepped on cocaine, and a pool full of bro jizz, I’d say we’re on the right track!”

The similarities between Tampa and Vegas are undeniable, Satanic like heat, idiot midwestern tourists, and pawn shops on every corner.

Anyone dumb enough to drive I-4 has witnessed the expansion unfold over the years.

New construction was build entirely from the homes gambled away by alcoholic fathers, much like Vegas in the 1970s.

Good bye Seminole Hard Rock welcome to Las Fake-Ass!