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FDA determines that lettuce is bad for you


The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has released startling news about lettuce, determining that it is actually not good for people to eat. “Hoo boy, we really blew it this time!” said scientist Dr. Edmund Brunchfaster from the FDA’s lab in Tampa. “I mean big time. Just huge. Wow!” The findings that directly contradict decades…

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St. Pete man conducts own sleep study

Sleep Study

Herb Clamstraddler of St. Petersburg has been compiling data from a sleep study he has been conducting on himself for the last six weeks and is now prepared to share his results. “First of all, I would like to express my appreciation to the media and esteemed members of the scientific community for being here…

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