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Tampa to host 2023 Trans Awards

Trans Awards

Tampa has been chosen as the destination of this years’ Trans Awards.

The ceremony will take place at the Mahaffey Theater in St. Petersburg. 

I wrote that last paragraph about a month ago and just sat down to finish the article. I don’t think there’s any more to say. It’s just funny to think that there would be something called the “Trans Awards.” Honestly, it might already exist. There’s a good chance of that actually, but I’m not doing any research because they always say, “Don’t do your own research, trust the experts!” And I don’t have an Trans Awards experts currently on my speed dial. Remember speed dial? Wow, does that still exist?

Oh, I’ve got it.

This years Trans Awards in Tampa are being sponsored by speed dial.

There we go!

I added the second thought to the first thought.


That’s how brains work.

You think stuff, you can combine the thoughts, you can choose not to, you can really do anything you set your mind to.

That’s what they say.

But you can’t levitate, or fly on your own.

I think of that all the time. I set my mind to it, but it still doesn’t happen. And that’s a major bum bum.

I shortened “bummer” to “bum bum.” 

That’s another example of a clever thing my brain can do. Shorten things, make nick-names.

Why is it called “nick-name?” Has anyone ever questioned that?

I’m sure there’s an answer for that, but like I said earlier in this piece of writing, I do not do my own research.

There’s a song by Big Sean called “Research.”

He says it’s something ho’s do.

Like they do “research” on you like they’re stalking you or learning about you online.

So it’s a bad thing.

The programming worked in changing my perception on the word “research.” Now I think it’s a bad thing. And that’s good?

Or like Michael Jackson would say, “Bad.”

But he meant it in a good way.

Like “Bad” equals “good.”

Does that make any sense?

Yea, it doesn’t to me either.

It’s the thing of like, making opposition cool.

Whatever one thing is, the opposite is always cool.

Like Bizarro Superman. He was cool right? Or was he bad? Was he a bad guy who was bad? Or a bad guy who was good? I don’t know. It hurts trying to do these mental gymnastics. I need to go lie down and jerk off.

John Jacobs

About John Jacobs

MTV Reality TV Star and Award-Winning Tampa News Force Correspondent. Subscribe to YouTube Channel, Follow on Twitter: @MaybachDiamonds Instagram: @MaybachDiamonds