Tampa to Replace Speed Limit Signs with Thumbs-Up Emoji

The City of Tampa today voted to remove all speed limit signs and replace them with a “thumbs-up” emoji to alert drivers that they are fine driving at whatever speed they feel comfortable going.

“We think this will cut back on the number of speeding tickets we give out,” said Officer Stede Tanking.

As part of the new program, police have upgraded their speed guns, and instead of reading vehicle velocity, they will display a thumbs up or thumbs down emoji.

“Not every car that is going very fast deserves to be pulled over,” said Officer Tanking.  “There are drivers that only drive well when they are going fast, and we have to take their feelings into consideration.”

The upgraded speed guns are AI-powered and can detect a vehicle’s value and the skin color of the driver. Its algorithm is fed real-time information from traffic cameras, and it ensures that officers are pulling over the right person every time.

“There are drivers who think that obscuring their license plates will stop us from finding them, but we will find you,” said Officer Tanking.

Drivers are encouraged to continue driving at the speed they feel comfortable with, but police warn that if someone wants to do something bad, they are watching and listening to everything with unwarranted surveillance technology, and all that information is being fed into an algorithm that can detect when someone is about to do something bad.