The beach water in Tampa has some of the finest nutrients in the world. While some claim you shouldn’t under any circumstances drink beach water, we recommend the following for those who decide to give it a try.
5. Ben T. Davis Beach
If you have no other option than to drink from the beach, then Ben T. Davis is going to be your #5 pick! This beach has lots of auto-runoff pollution, and just a general sense of nastiness, despite being incredibly beautiful. It seems like there’s lots of small jellyfish that are either dead, or living a barely tolerable life, floating in tiny puddles of dirty salt water. If you have no other drinkable water and are forced to drink from this ocean, you’re probably going to feel pretty sick afterwards. It’s not ideal, however it’s still in the top five because at least it’s Hillsborough runoff pollution, and that’s a relatively cleaner county.
4. Davis Island Dog Beach
This beach is beautiful and full of playful puppies which makes for a fun Sunday outing of family friendly bonding time. Of course you could drink from the dog washing stations if you needed to ingest some clean water. However, if you’re on the beach, and you don’t have the ability to drink from the washing stations, if it’s an absolute emergency, and situational factors have led you with no other option, this is #4 on the list of beaches to drink from. The water here is directly across from some sort of industrial power plants or processing plants, along with what looks like large boat refueling stations, which makes the water not ideally cleaner on the spectrum of polluted beach waters, especially because of the extra animal dander which floats around from the playful pups. Again, it’s not recommended that you drink from the ocean! However, if there are no other available options, for a matter of survival, these are the oceans in the order you would enjoy if forced to do so.
3. Honeymoon Island Beach
As far as clean ocean drinking water conditions go, you’re really not going to get much better than this. This beach is completely detached from the mainland, connected by a bridge, a beautifully tucked-in cove of nature, providing panoramic ocean views from numerous points on the beach, a true sense of desolation in paradise. If you have no other choice but to drink from the ocean, this is going to be one of the least gut wrenching ones to do so. It’s got a decent sodium to water ratio, giving minimal bite on that overwhelmingly salty taste. Enjoy a slightly refreshing gulp of sand soaked sea water while getting a view into the lives of happy couples potentially enjoying their honeymoons on honeymoon island beach.
2. St. Pete Beach
This beach has it all. Kava, Kratom, crafts, beards, tattoos, coot hats and sunglasses, beachside bars, and some of the most beautiful views on earth. Perfect to see while you’re hunched over drinking ocean water. If you absolutely must drink from the ocean and do not have any source of clean drinking water within reach during an emergency moment, you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how clean the St. Pete beach water is. The citizens of St. Pete are relatively environmentally conscious, and do a good job keeping mother earth clean, so if you need to drink from the ocean for some reason, this isn’t too bad of a place to do it.
1. Clearwater Beach
While all the beaches have traces of pollution in them, this one has some runoff from Tampas most valuable contribution to society. Hooters. Clearwater is the location of the Original Hooters, and we all know that somehow the Hooters pollution carries over to the beach waters, and if you have/want to drink from the clearwater ocean, than know that you’re in for a kick of Hooters wing sauce, which is the exact compliment the ocean needs, to transform it from a murky pool of animal fluids, to an oyster bisque, which taste heavenly. This isn’t a joke guys, go drink the water at Clearwater Beach, you will not be disappointed. This ocean water is coming in at #1 for this reason. And also, don’t drink ocean water. There’s always a better alternative, even if it’s not drinking any water.