Rogue Outlier McDonalds Serves Breakfast Until Noon

A McDonald’s on the east outskirts of Tampa is defying corporate mandates by offering their breakfast menu until 12pm, an hour and a half after the restaurant is supposed to start serving lunch. 

“We cater to people who work odd hours or hang out at bars or just do a lot of cocaine”, said Lynda Greasney, the restaurant’s manager. “And for people like us, five and a half hours isn’t a big enough daily window to get up and go get breakfast.”

“I know I appreciate it because breakfast is the most important meal of the day so sausage, egg and cheese burritos and hash browns are inherently healthier than Big Macs and fries,” said regular customer Todd Bonzalez. “They’re not? Shit. Oh well.”

“We have the muffins. We have the ‘bacon’. We have the ‘eggs’,” said Greasney. “What the fuck?”

A representative from McDonalds corporate said they don’t support the practice but since the location is compliant with other policies qnd is profitable, “what the fuck.”

“Of course our ice cream machine doesn’t work,” said Greasney. “At the end of the day, we’re still a McDonald’s.”