Local
Odessa family installs mass shooting victims pool
The Menando family, who lives on Gunn Highway in Odessa near Tampa may have the most unique swimming pool in the state of Florida: it’s in the shape of the aftermath of a mass shooting. “It’s actually four separate pools and they’re supposed to represent us; me, my wife Brenda, our son Kevin and our…
Read MoreTightest escorts in Tampa Bay
If you’re looking for an escort in Tampa, odds are you’re going to prefer one that has a tight vagina. Some people think a tight vagina feels better for sex. So if you’re looking for an escort with a good grip on her snatch, these are the ones to seek. Lexa She’s got a real…
Read MoreClearwater man anticipates huge tax break
Rodney Wyhyte of Clearwater plans to take full advantage of a new tax loophole created by Florida Governor Ron DeSantis in order to fight wokeness. ““What I have said is we have people that say under climate change, that gives them the right to regulate and control everything people do. And we reject that in…
Read MoreMasturbation in public parks now legal for one hour per day
A new addendum has certified that masturbation in public parks is now legal for one hour per day, every day of the week. After a 6-3 vote by the Tampa Parks Authority, exposing sexual organs in public for self gratification is now legal from 8-9pm every night, as long as it’s within park limits. The…
Read MoreTampa police unveil new cum sniffing dog
The TPD have welcomed a new cum sniffing dog named Clyde to the force, who is the first of a new breed of a dog specifically raised to smell cum. “Sex criminals leave semen and usually it’s hard to find, but now not only can dogs sniff it out, but they can identify who’s semen…
Read MoreDunedin man suffers brain trauma over time change
Doug Beadle of Dunedin suffered a significant brain injury this morning, trying to understand Daylight Savings Time which ended early Sunday morning. “I was fine; in fact, I felt great after that extra hour of sleep last night,” he said from his bed at Mease Dunedin Hospital. He was sitting at his kitchen table at…
Read MoreUnmonitored drag strips in Tampa
If you live in Tampa you’ve thought about drag racing. These are the best strips to drag on which are the least monitored. RuPaul’s RuPaul’s Drag Race is one of the best places to drag race. It’s got lights and a sturdy stage, you will really like it. East 56th street and Montcler Lane This…
Read MoreSt. Pete man’s correct usage of current slang annoys granddaughter
16-year-old Megyn Morton of St. Petersburg finds herself in an almost constant state of aggravation because of her grandfather Henry “Hank” Morton’s accurate usage of currently relevant slang terminology. “About a month ago, my parents bought him an iPhone 13, which is newer than my iPhone 10, by the way,” she said. “The idea was…
Read MoreNew park opens in downtown Tampa
Tampa’s latest downtown park has opened at the corner of Morgan Street and Channelside Drive, across the street from Amalie Arena. “Communication Park” occupies approximately two square yards of greenspace near the new Water Street development district and is dominated by a large round metal sculpture titled ‘COMMUNICATION’. “We think the art sends a powerful…
Read MoreFamily learns about deceased patriarch from strip club marquee
The family of Tampa’s Larry Craper, husband, father, and grandfather, learned of his recent passing after seeing a remembrance message displayed on the digital marquee outside the 2001 Odyssey gentlemen’s club on Dale Mabry. “I just assumed he had left me. I didn’t know he was dead,” said his widow, Marlene Craper. “He’s done that…
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