Posts by Jon Griffiths
Trump demands absentee voting done by carrier pigeon
With paranoid concerns that voting by mail could lead to voter fraud or allow foreign governments the ability to influence the upcoming election due to ballots being printed overseas, President Trump announced that he has removed the mail-in ballot all together, replacing it with what he claims to be the more secure option; carrier pigeons.…
Read MoreAshley’s poised to replace Karen’s
They are called Ashley’s and a group of Tampa Karen’s wants you to know more about their annoying millennial counterparts.
Read MoreCooties numbers rise amongst pandemic
The disease originally thought only to be carried by girls and transmitted through actions such as hand holding, hugging or kissing in places like lunchroom cafeterias or playground tubes away from the judging eyes of other children, is more complex than ever imagined and has more sinister effects on the human body than originally thought.
Read MoreNose Picking Drivers in danger under new law
You might want to think twice next time you’re driving and feel the urge to go mining for green gold, a new law goes into effect June 1st that could “stick” you with a hefty fine or you even find yourself behind bars if you’re caught. A stern message was sent yesterday by the Hillsborough…
Read MoreBusiness savy panhandler creates union
As the world braces for the economic aftermath of a major pandemic a group of Tampa panhandlers unionize to better prepare themselves. long time crack user and panhandler Kenneth Stevens who is known by Bong Water on the street had a vision of an organization that could help keep panhandling alive despite the lack of “spare…
Read MoreBucs sign ghost of Lee Roy Selmon
In a press conference earlier today Buccaneers General Manager Jason Licht confirmed the team is currently in talks with the spirit of former Buccaneer and crosstown expressway namesake, Lee Roy Selmon, to replace Todd Bowles as Defensive coordinator in an obvious effort to once again shock the city by negotiating yet another seemingly impossible placement…
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