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Florida implements women’s health education initiative

Storytime with Stan

In response to negative feedback directed toward his proposed new legislation that would ban discussion of menstrual cycles and other human sexuality topics in elementary grades, Republican Representative Stan McClain from Ocala has proposed something of a compromise. “Fine. I’ll talk to them about it,” he said. “Welcome to ‘Storytime with Stan’.” As written by…

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Line of books from Mike Huckabee in no way intended to groom children

Kids Guide

American politician, Baptist minister, and political commentator Mike Huckabee, who served as the 44th governor of Arkansas, is touting a line of children’s literature designed to educate but in no way indoctrinate or unduly influence them in any way. “The mainstream media has been no friend to President Trump, and they’ll never admit that he…

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Super-talented baby creeps out parents

Talented baby

Little Amy Pleebler, an exceptionally gifted musical prodigy at two years old, is intimidating her parents, Bob and Wendy. “She sings like a perfect angel and even plays the piano a little bit. She knows, like, chord progressions and shit,” said Wendy. “How? How?!?” “It’s just so weird the way she’s good at stuff”, Wendy…

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College replaces diplomas with NFTs


Tampa Business School has officially become the first university to replace diplomas with digital NFTs during their graduation ceremony. “People are used to getting a piece of paper when they finish their education, but that’s worthless!” Said Dean Marry Lou Basil, Head Administrator of the Tampa Business School. “We teach business here, and nothing is…

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8 words you should never say to your dog

Dog Talk

Dogs are man’s best friend, but they can also turn on the man depending on how their talked to. This is a list of 8 words you should never say to your dog: Arf When you make dog sounds, you don’t know what you’re saying to them in their language. When you say “arf” you’re…

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“F*ggot” and other hateful words removed from the dictionary


8 words have recently been removed from all dictionaries across the world in an effort to crackdown on hate speech. “If these words are never taught, or acknowledged, people will not know how to be racist or hateful.” Said Miriam Webster, inventor of the first dictionary, and severed head living in a cryogenic freezer. “People…

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5 fake words that sound real


Blurston That’s a fake word that sounds like it could potentially be real. Kincondaing Kinconda sounds like an action, and kincondaing sounds like the verb of when you do that action. When you kinconda, you’re kincondaing. Makes sense? It shouldn’t, because it’s not a real word. Jeminiah Sounds more like a name, but it kind…

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St. Pete man hung up on ethnic origin of Fibonacci sequence


Ted Henderson, a student majoring in Economics at Eckerd College in St. Petersburg was recently thrown off track by something that came up in one of his classes and he has not been able to resolve it or move on from it. “I just don’t know what to think,” he said. “This changes everything.” The…

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USF offering new degree programs

USF Grad

In light of criticism over student loan forgiveness, the University of South Florida (USF) is offering degrees in a variety of new fields. “Many people have expressed concern over our curriculum, specifically that young people are enrolling here at USF to seek frivolous educations in order to escape so-called real-world responsibilities like being poor and…

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