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The perks of live-aboard in SW FL!

Boating and stuff

With rent sky-high, more Tampa Bay residents than ever are looking to live landlord-free aboard an anchored sailboat. You can find many fixer-upper functioning sailboats for only a few thousand or even a few hundred dollars on craigslist. Tampa News Force’s most trustworthy local News-Talker Chris Coon opens up on his experience living aboard a…

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TNF Horoscopes romance edition!

Horoscope

Here’s some nifty tricks and tips to find the person of your dreams! Horoscopes from Tampa Bay’s 14th best astrologer Chris Coon! Aries: Keep considering yourself hot enough to be desired. Your self-image and confidence have a tangible effect on other people’s perception of you, and tastes vary wider than you might think. Also your…

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Horoscopes from Tampa’s only gender-fluid astrologist

Horoscope

Aries Mercury is in retrograde for you this month. Not the planet. The Roman god of commerce, transit, messages, and the immortal guide to the afterlife. He will personally cause you to backslide deeper into your creepy fanfic addiction. But Mercury will also give you the gift of prophecy. You’ll think, “Oh gosh I bet…

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Mayor of St Petersburg announces special military operation in Odessa, Fl.

St Petersburg’s mayor, Kenneth T Welch said the following a brief statement to the press: “Нам не чуждо любить Ты знаешь правила, как и я В полном объем о чём я думаю Ты не получишь это от другого парня Я просто хочу рассказать тебе, что я чувствую Я чувствую, что должен дать тебе понять” and…

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You’ll never believe what Tom Brady’s Horoscope said!

Horoscope

Bringing you the horoscope once again is our resident Horoscopologist, Chris Coon, and this week you’ll never believe what Tom Brady’s horoscope was! Aries While in a coffee shop across from an intellectual, you will unwittingly inspire a new wave of a political philosophy that will revolutionize 22nd century geopolitics. That philosophy: Ugly people should…

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New themed restaurant in Ybor first in Tampa to be 100% flooded

Flooded

 Good News, Gourmands! A new restaurant, The Crusted Tripe & Busted Pipe has debuted in Ybor City on the corner of 15th St and Ninth Ave, making it Tampa Bay’s first and so far only 100% flooded restaurant. No longer do fine diners looking for the classic “flooded restaurant date” have to go to Orlando,…

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Letter from IRS bodes poor for TNF writer’s future

COON IRS

An email from the IRS was sent to TNF writer Chris Coon, and we’ve published the message in it’s entirety here: From The Internal Revenue Service: To Christopher Coon, CEO of “Chris Coon’s Flimsy Alligator Tax Shelter,” I am hereby denying the tax exempt status of your organization. Your mission statement: “Alligators should be more…

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