Posts Tagged ‘st. pete’
St. Pete bookstore must expand again
How many more books need to be banned đź“š
Read MoreSt. Pete man assaulted for misidentifying dog
Pete Wieters of St. Petersburg was punched in the face yesterday for misidentifying the breed of a woman’s dog. “She had a really cute dog and all I did was ask her if it was a Frenchy, a French Bulldog,” he said. “Next thing I know, she clocks me.” “I get that all the time…
Read MoreSt. Pete woman’s independent survey yields somewhat surprising results
Laura Floon of St. Petersburg recently conducted an informal survey finding that 82% of single men who go on dates with her have “Pod-casts” they “Really want to focus on”. “It’s amazing, really. I expected the number to be high but that’s ridiculous,” she said. “Has there ever been anything that universally popular with that…
Read MoreMan regales local bar patrons with crazy story: “I could have beaten DeSantis”
A stranger wandered into a bar in St. Petersburg last night and proceeded to entertain patrons with a wild tall tale. “I don’t know who that dude is, but he’s hilarious,” said Todd Filbert, who happened to be among the small crowd at Stankbooty’s Taproom on Central Avenue. “He was really telling some whoppers!” The…
Read MoreSt. Pete man hung up on ethnic origin of Fibonacci sequence
Ted Henderson, a student majoring in Economics at Eckerd College in St. Petersburg was recently thrown off track by something that came up in one of his classes and he has not been able to resolve it or move on from it. “I just don’t know what to think,” he said. “This changes everything.” The…
Read MoreSt. Pete seafood restaurant lists all menu items at “flea market price”
Robert “Bob” Smidsworth, owner and manager of Scuttler’s Seafood & Good Times Crabateria in St. Peterburg has announced that from now on, all the entrees on their menu will be listed as ‘flea market price.’ “Listing items at ‘market price’ is a fairly common practice at seafood restaurants,” he said. “It means the price of…
Read MoreTop 5 Places In Tampa Bay To Be Buried Alive
For many people, being buried alive is their most terrifying nightmare, a fate worse than death that eventually results in death. We wouldn’t wish that on anyone, just like how no one would wish it on themselves. But hey, it could happen to any of us and if it did, wouldn’t it be a good…
Read MoreSt. Pete man’s correct usage of current slang annoys granddaughter
16-year-old Megyn Morton of St. Petersburg finds herself in an almost constant state of aggravation because of her grandfather Henry “Hank” Morton’s accurate usage of currently relevant slang terminology. “About a month ago, my parents bought him an iPhone 13, which is newer than my iPhone 10, by the way,” she said. “The idea was…
Read More7′ man rejected by Tampa Bay panhandler community
Dennis Smeeks, a 7′ tall homeless man currently in Tampa, is not being accepted by local panhandlers due to his height. “Dolph or Dirk or whatever his name needs to get the hell out of here and go back to the NBA where he belongs,” said veteran panhandler Johnny America. “He has no business out…
Read MoreTampa Bay’s first Small Batch Sperm Bank set to open in St. Pete
This spring, Tampa Bay will be home to the very first of its kind, small batch sperm bank. You have questions and so did we when we sat down with managing partner and brainchild of the operation, Peter Pulaski. He had plenty to say on the issue when TNF correspondent Miles Neff sat down to…
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