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Woke uncle wrecks family’s Thanksgiving

Woke Uncle

Kenneth Childress of South Bend, Indiana, ruined his family’s Thanksgiving while visiting them in Tampa by sharing his extremely tolerant and socially aware opinions during the traditional holiday meal. “Uncle Kenneth is always a handful. He just can’t help himself,” said Carl Childress, who works hard all year to keep a roof over this family’s…

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Clearwater man advocates for Super Bowl becoming official holiday

Craig Shoomaker of Clearwater firmly believes that the Super Bowl, the annual championship of the National Football League, should be declared a federal holiday.  “It just makes sense; it’s a day when we all come together and celebrate,” he said. “Isn’t that what holidays are for?” He gestured to the people gathered at the Super…

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St. Pete woman shames carolers

Carolers

Linda Ech of St. Petersburg met a group of her neighbors out caroling with scorn and derision, sending them home feeling terrible about themselves. “People are going to call me a Karen or a Grinch, and that’s fine, if you’re not above petty name calling,” said the professor of music history at St. Pete Junior…

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Quiz: What kind of holiday gift are you?

Gift Exchange

There are only a couple of shopping days until The Big Day. No doubt you have people in your life who say YOU are all the gift they would ever want. And no doubt they mean that sincerely, but there are gifts and then there are GIFTS. So exactly what kind of gift are you?…

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Tampa dog approves of Christmas

Christmas Dog

Piccolo, a Corgi who lives near Oldsmar, has decided that Christmas is pretty good. “I can’t speak for all dogs, but I think it’s nice”, he said. “I know some dogs hate wearing the goofy outfits and that there is a lot of noise and commotion, which can cause anxiety. I get that and I…

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Low-level employee attends wrong company holiday party

Holiday Party

Due to being included in a group email by mistake, Mike Clunbgh, a shipping clerk for United Business System Analysis Coordinators, Inc. in Tampa, attended the wrong employee holiday party Saturday night. “Right company, but definitely the wrong party actually,” said Clunbgh. “Jennifer is the one who sent out the email. I guess she should…

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Tampa CEO sexually aroused by action taken by Better.com

CEO

Brent Sppoonholder, the CEO of Integrated Associated Business Systems Inc., a Tampa-based company that makes profits, had an interesting reaction to the news that Better.com recently fired 900 employees during a Zoom call. “This is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life,” he said. “And technically, it isn’t porn so I can’t even…

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Tampa man annoys neighbors with Thanksgiving fireworks

Danny Gwishtner of Tampa has drawn the ire of his Town and Country neighbors for setting off fireworks in his backyard on Thanksgiving for some reason.  “I couldn’t figure out what the hell he was doing”, said Kevin Hormuz who lives directly next door. “So that was the exact question I asked him: ‘what the…

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Top Five Items That Should NOT Be Donated To Holiday Food Drives

Food drives

The holiday season kicks into full gear officially today, with it being Thanksgiving. That means various establishments and institutions will be launching their annual food drives to benefit the less fortunate. You’re a kind and compassionate person who wants to help and we want to help you in helping others. We’re all here to helpity…

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