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Sacred Geometry just a bunch of gay numbers

Sacred Geometry

I went to check out all that sacred geometry bullsh*t that everybody is always talking about and it was just a bunch of stupid numbers. Who cares? So everything in life can be broken down mathematically and that’s where binary comes from, and all matter is just tiny particles floating around and colliding and this…

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Coveting thy neighbor actually good for your health

Covet

Hey! Doing that thing you’re not supposed to do is actually good for you. Yea, it’s true. You know how you compare yourself to other people are you get upset you’re not as successful as them? That’s good! Keep doing it! When you throw yourself into tantric tantrums, shattering your chakras and sending them in…

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Will AI replace or enhance imagination?

AI

Everyone’s pussy’s have been squirting over the new AI art programs. “Are computers going to replace us? Will they take our jobs? Are they more artistic and creative than humans are?” Yes and no. They’re creating based off of what humans have already made. They can only work with what we give them. Like science.…

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Scientists determine “the vibe is off”

Vibe

A group of scientists from the Nobel-Prize-winning Gentry Labs Organization in Seminole, Florida, have concluded after a months-long experiment, that “the vibe is off.” “Yea, the vibe is just totally off man.” Said Dr. Tren Tinueve. “We’ve just like, we’ve just like been looking at everything and like, its just like, not right, you know?…

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How to $tick it to Tampa News Force

Stick it to TNF

In an obvious effort to curry favor with poor, put-upon, tough-as-nails-yet-apparently-thin-skinned Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, Florida Senator Jason Brodeur (R-Lake Mary) has introduced “Senate Bill 1316: Information Dissemination“, which would require any blogger writing about government officials to register with the Florida Office of Legislative Services or the Commission on Ethics. Brodeur, who you may…

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TNF Investigative Report: The Santos Connection

Santos

Sometimes you don’t have to go very far to find a scandal. As more and more information comes out regarding Long Island (NY) Rep.-elect and admitted huge liar George Santos, it has also become apparent that there might be some sort of insidious connection between him and Tampa News Force co-founder Joshua Santos, based on…

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TNF Editor loses huge stockpile of amazing comedy

Editor

Larry Inkvein, a lower level editor with the Editing Division of the Editorial Department at Tampa News Force, has apparently lost hundreds, maybe dozens, of brilliantly written, hysterically funny comedy news articles due to being an inattentive dumbass. “Ah, fuck,” he said. “Apparently when I was scheduling those beauties, I inadvertently dated them for 2022…

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Scientists predict by 2030 all news will be fake

NewNews

Based off current trends, scientists have made a prediction that by the year 2030, all news will be considered fake in one way or another. “Fake in the sense that, it will revolve around some trivial topic like a celebrity or a food recipe and not actually be relevant to society.” Said Dennis Bird, lead…

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Crunchwrap Supreme Court, Taco Bell launches own judiciary system

Sovereign Taco Bell

If you frequent Taco Bell you may be deemed legally, Doritos Locos, after the franchise has declared all 7,235 of its locations as sovereign nations with their own sets of laws and regulations. Sparked by citizens rising want for abortions, Taco Bell realized that if it operated as its own country, it would be able…

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