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Tampa gimp having difficulty meeting women


Carl Foster of Tampa, a man who identifies as sexually submissive, is frustrated that he’s having trouble getting dates.

“I don’t understand. I’m a good guy. I really am,” he said, while eating dinner alone at Skyye Bar & Grill. “I own a home in a nice neighborhood. I have a good job. I’m in good shape physically. I’m open-minded. I don’t drink to excess or use drugs. Obviously, I’m inclined to be attentive to a woman’s needs. I’d think I’d be considered a catch.”

“At this stage in my life, I kind of want to settle down with someone. Have a couple of kids, maybe coach youth sports. Just share my life, you know?” he added. “I can’t imagine what the problem is but no matter what I do, I can’t seem to meet anyone.”

“You don’t think it’s the black, leather mask with a zipper over the mouth, do you?” he asked plaintively.

“It’s definitely the mask,” said Pam Palmer, an attractive and eligible woman from Tampa eating at a nearby table with two equally hot, single female friends. “WTF is with that creepy thing?”

Clark Brooks

About Clark Brooks

Senior Supreme Executive Premium Content Editor for Tampa News Force. Comedian, writer and ordained minister. Twitter: @ClarkBrooks | Instagram:@ClarkBrooks54