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Marco Rubio Top Disseminator of Gay Erotica


In an attempt to shame a group of people for being recognized by the LA Dodgers, Marco Rubio has accidentally become the top disseminator of gay erotica on social media.

“It’s disgusting seeing what the MLB glorifies these days,” said Florida Senator, Marco Rubio. “Someone sent me the full performance of these mostly naked guys doing a pole dance on a cross and I just had to share it with everyone I knew.”

Senator Rubio then took out his phone.

“You got an iPhone? I’ll airdrop you the full video.” Said Rubio. “It’s disgusting, you got to watch these gays dance.”

I lied and said I was an Android person, so Senator Rubio continued,  “I got the RAW, 4K footage of the performance. I color-corrected it, boosted the audio a bit, and since it was in 4K, I was able to zoom in and put a warp stabilizer filter on it to make the footage clear and smooth.”

Senator Rubio proudly explained how he personally spent many hours editing the video clips so he could share them across all his social media accounts. 

“I must have gotten like 20 clips out of that thing, and I shared it everywhere.” Said Rubio, who then walked me through all his social media accounts. “I have my personal and my Senator account, so it’s good to share to both that’s like two different audiences.  My day ones and my fake ones.”

Rubio then thanked me for the interview and left to go share some more gay porn with all of his followers. 

Josh Santos

About Josh Santos

Writer and award-winning videographer and documentarian. Instagram: @HashtagSantos